Corksport has some fucking explaining to do

[Monotonous ONE]

[Monotonous ONE]

KIM RUSSELL TOUCHED MY PACKAGE



So. I ordered a Badass Corksport shirt and while I had some good ideas of what to say in the notes portion...I ended up asking Kim Russell to personally see my order through so that 1) there's a possibility her scent may be left on my item and 2) I knew my package would be in the right gentle, caressing, sensual, caring hands.

She obliged.



And I received this in my shipment.


I found the entire shipment to be very symbolic to our relationship. Especially the picture. She's got some wicked skills by the way.

First is the pink packing paper. Red is the color of love as most of you may know. Pink is the color of "i want to feel you deeply penetrate me while you gently pull my hair." Message received Kim, message received.

Then there's the picture. Obviously I am the Speed3. Obviously Kim is the sexy ass female pictured. The metaphor here is much like a bull vs a matador. I'm in the car...touching myself...revving the engine. There she is with her red flag dropped...exposing her tight and athletic figure....saying " come and get this. It's yours."

So naturally I took this piece of erotic art and covered up some family members on my fridge. My girlfriend wonders why I have an erection every time I leave the kitchen. She will know soon enough when Kim and I are united and our escalating sexual frustrations are finally released. Until then. I may need to order a lanyard now.





@rfinkle2; @Raider; @CorkSport;

[evil MS3]

That is hilarious. Glad she has a sense of humor lol



Give it a little tap tap taparoo...

[gigliotti175]

That made my day...


Tapa tapa tapatalk

[rfinkle2]

HAHA. Monotonous One. You have cracked me up MANY times over the years, but that post was epic (yes, epic) in a sick but poetic type of way.

Thanks for the tag man. You never disappoint.

[Monotonous ONE]

Originally Posted by rfinkle2 HAHA. Monotonous One. You have cracked me up MANY times over the years, but that post was epic (yes, epic) in a sick but poetic type of way. Thanks for the tag man. You never disappoint.

I wanted you to feel like your Ray Finkle memorabilia was absolute shit by comparison. Which...it is by the way. I am victorious.

[rfinkle2]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE I wanted you to feel like your Ray Finkle memorabilia was absolute shit by comparison. Which...it is by the way. I am victorious.

LOL. I admit defeat.

[keymaster]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE KIM RUSSELL TOUCHED MY PACKAGE So. I ordered a Badass Corksport shirt and while I had some good ideas of what to say in the notes portion...I ended up asking Kim Russell to personally see my order through so that 1) there's a possibility her scent may be left on my item and 2) I knew my package would be in the right gentle, caressing, sensual, caring hands. She obliged. And I received this in my shipment. I found the entire shipment to be very symbolic to our relationship. Especially the picture. She's got some wicked skills by the way. First is the pink packing paper. Red is the color of love as most of you may know. Pink is the color of "i want to feel you deeply penetrate me while you gently pull my hair." Message received Kim, message received. Then there's the picture. Obviously I am the Speed3. Obviously Kim is the sexy ass female pictured. The metaphor here is much like a bull vs a matador. I'm in the car...touching myself...revving the engine. There she is with her red flag dropped...exposing her tight and athletic figure....saying " come and get this. It's yours." So naturally I took this piece of erotic art and covered up some family members on my fridge. My girlfriend wonders why I have an erection every time I leave the kitchen. She will know soon enough when Kim and I are united and our escalating sexual frustrations are finally released. Until then. I may need to order a lanyard now. @rfinkle2; @Raider; @CorkSport;

You know, that red cape thing in the picture looks like the red paper she wrapped your package in...so if you were paying attention to the subtext you'd realize she rubbed the paper against her ass before wrapping your package and sending it to you.

Hope you didn't make too much of a mess thinking about that.....

[dooderek]

[Monotonous ONE]

Originally Posted by keymaster You know, that red cape thing in the picture looks like the red paper she wrapped your package in...so if you were paying attention to the subtext you'd realize she rubbed the paper against her ass before wrapping your package and sending it to you. Hope you didn't make too much of a mess thinking about that.....

You may be on to something here.

Or perhaps she took the wrapping paper off of her vagina....which is being figuratively presented to me in a giftlike fashion.

[BobbleHead]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE You may be on to something here. Or perhaps she took the wrapping paper off of her vagina....which is being figuratively presented to me in a giftlike fashion.

you can send nator OR or WA to go ask

[Monotonous ONE]

Or you can stay the fuck away from her.

[BobbleHead]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE Or you can stay the fuck away from her.

Unless you're planning on coming to Vancouver, WA, you cant call dibs.

[AustinK]

Because calling dibs on a woman isn't archaic.

[evil MS3]

You remember who you're talking to right? LOL

[Easter Bunny]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE KIM RUSSELL TOUCHED MY PACKAGE So. I ordered a Badass Corksport shirt and while I had some good ideas of what to say in the notes portion...I ended up asking Kim Russell to personally see my order through so that 1) there's a possibility her scent may be left on my item and 2) I knew my package would be in the right gentle, caressing, sensual, caring hands. She obliged. And I received this in my shipment. I found the entire shipment to be very symbolic to our relationship. Especially the picture. She's got some wicked skills by the way. First is the pink packing paper. Red is the color of love as most of you may know. Pink is the color of "i want to feel you deeply penetrate me while you gently pull my hair." Message received Kim, message received. Then there's the picture. Obviously I am the Speed3. Obviously Kim is the sexy ass female pictured. The metaphor here is much like a bull vs a matador. I'm in the car...touching myself...revving the engine. There she is with her red flag dropped...exposing her tight and athletic figure....saying " come and get this. It's yours." So naturally I took this piece of erotic art and covered up some family members on my fridge. My girlfriend wonders why I have an erection every time I leave the kitchen. She will know soon enough when Kim and I are united and our escalating sexual frustrations are finally released. Until then. I may need to order a lanyard now.

So many thoughts:

First: why no mention for me? As the only person who is possibly as excited as you by this development i feel left out.

Second: Time to scan that sucker and use it as your avatar.

Third: It appears that someone at Corksport spend more time on that drawing than anyone at SURE/Street Unit/Cullen's tranny girlfriend ever spent on the design of any of their products

Fourth: I think that this is an omen that it is time to get the fuck out of your current living situation and move west to start your new life with Kim

Fifth: you can totally take the old dude from that photo of Kim in a battle royale.

Sixth: i wonder if she realizes the storm she just stirred up for herself.

[keymaster]

Originally Posted by Easter Bunny Sixth: i wonder if she realizes the storm she just stirred up for herself.

Are you kidding? She's sitting at Corksport HQ laughing her ass off about it.

[Monotonous ONE]

Somebody here is fucking with the wrong motherfucker.

That's all I'm going to say at this time.

[Easter Bunny]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE Somebody here is fucking with the wrong motherfucker. That's all I'm going to say at this time.

Why is your avatar not updated?

[Monotonous ONE]

Originally Posted by Easter Bunny Why is your avatar not updated?

It will be soon.

Gotta get back in front of a computer. I been on the run all day.



And I'm sorry I didn't mention you. You literally are my all-time favorite poster.

By far.

[SofaKingAwesome]

@Monotonous ONE;
You're welcome.

edit: Kim doesn't want to share her sexeh with the world, removed at her request.
Another Corksport letdown...

edit edit: It can stay.

[zatara]

This is the creepiest thread I have ever read on these forums...I love it...

[Monotonous ONE]

Originally Posted by SofaKingAwesome @Monotonous ONE; You're welcome.

Lol she called me a turd for posting the one with her dad.

Figured I'd keep that batch of awesomeness to me and my boner.

[SofaKingAwesome]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE Lol she called me a turd for posting the one with her dad. Figured I'd keep that batch of awesomeness to me and my boner.

You got a boner from a picture of her and her dad?

[Easter Bunny]

Originally Posted by SofaKingAwesome You got a boner from a picture of her dad that she was in?

fixed

[Monotonous ONE]

Originally Posted by SofaKingAwesome You got a boner from a picture of her and her dad?

No I mean the picture you posted gives me boners.

Her dad isn't bad though.

[AustinK]

[that1rowdyracer]

Originally Posted by xpystchrisx Fixed...

Originally Posted by keymaster You know, that red cape thing in the picture looks like the red paper she wrapped your package in...so if you were paying attention to the subtext you'd realize she rubbed the paper against her ass before wrapping your package and sending it to you. Hope you didn't make too much of a mess thinking about that.....

As he go racing over to the garbage can to recover the pink wrapping for which will bring manny fapping sessions.

[Tommy]

Too much?

[SofaKingAwesome]

Originally Posted by Tommy Too much?

"Sent from your bedroom" would have been better.

[Monotonous ONE]

Im just going to leave this here.

enjoy.

[evil MS3]

Uh, did you make that, or did she? LOL

[Monotonous ONE]

i was inspired

[evil MS3]

I'm growing more concerned for Kim as the days progress LOL

[Monotonous ONE]

[SofaKingAwesome]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE Im just going to leave this here. enjoy.

You PM me yesterday and ask me to take my picture down for her, then post this?
Make sure when you fap to that, you hit her dad too.

[Monotonous ONE]

Mine is conservative.

Yours is breasticle related.

[Easter Bunny]

Originally Posted by Monotonous ONE Mine is conservative. Yours is breasticle related.

Soooo did you start packing your bags yet?

[Monotonous ONE]

Originally Posted by Easter Bunny Soooo did you start packing your bags yet?

considered packing my whorefriends bags

[Monotonous ONE]

Wayne's World she's a babe.. - YouTube

Wayne's World she's a babe.. - YouTube

It will be mine. Oh yes. It will be mine. - YouTube

It will be mine. Oh yes. It will be mine. - YouTube